I have a long and varied experience of supporting people through trauma from a human resources perspective. I’ve dealt with sexual assault, sudden deaths (including of children), suicide, attempted suicide, and breakdowns in mental health. These scenarios are extremely distressing for the people concerned, and they look to me for support, guidance, or just someone to listen.

Not taking away in any way from their trauma, how does that affect me? That is the first difficult question, which leaves you with a sense of guilt for ‘making it about you’. However, it is unrealistic, and unhealthy, not to think about that impact and find a way through it – so that you can be at your best for them, and for yourself.

How do those situations make me feel? A want to be professional when all you want to do is give that person a hug and tell them everything will be ok. A want to fix those problems for them and take the pain away. It’s taken time to realise that those feelings are ok. To know that you can’t take someone’s trauma away, but you can support them, you can let them talk, you can help them find practical help and solutions.

And then you can take a step back and recognise that this is also difficult for you.

I find it’s important not to underestimate that people’s resilience to difficult topics varies dramatically – we often have no idea what those people have already experienced in their lives, or what those resilience levels look like. It’s not always ‘water off a duck’s back’.

Sarah Earl, Chambers Director at Old Square Chambers

Want to get practical strategies to recognise, understand and respond skilfully to trauma?

Book your place at the Bar Council’s trauma-informed practice training for clerks and chambers staff on Wednesday 28 January.